Cannibal Kebobs
Rip out! Barbeque! Devour!
by Shannon Bucaro
If I had one wish, I would kidnap the world and lock everyone in a room that streamed Cannibal Holocaust 24/7 on a big screen TV. Why on earth would someone do this, you ask? It’s simple, you see: too many people have not seen this movie! Furthermore, I’d be doing you all a disservice if I didn’t internet slap you, call you an idiot, and then tell you to get on it.
Marc and I did a lot of talking about penis last month, …

Sleepaway Camp
Welcome to Camp Arawak, where Angela has a little extra in her bun
Now I know back in December I promised you all butt showing by June, but since that is not entirely my style I think I’ve found something much better. This compromise is guaranteed to wow and shock you in ways you may never deemed possible. Although I must warn you, this is not for the faint at heart. If you are not sitting right now you probably should be. Ready….Set…..Here goes:

Ok, ok you all had to …

A Nightmare On Elm Street
Freddy’s Finger(ling) Potatoes
by Shannon Bucaro
Okay, so it’s true, I’m jumping on the Freddy remake bandwagon. Wow, that was hard to say. I imagine me typing that feels a lot like someone attending their first AA meeting. I think I’m starting to break out in a cold sweat and a rash is forming. Ahh, conformity.
I remember getting the news like it was yesterday. It was an abnormally calm night, there was no sound of car alarms or gun shots anywhere insight, and visions of root …

Rabid Cream Cupcakes
You can’t trust your mother…your best friend…the neighbor next door
by Shannon Bucaro
I wish everyone could stare through their computer screen and see what I will be doing for the month of April. Hey now, get your head out of the gutter, it’s not that frightening or raunchy! I must warn you though, come April I usually give up on life and live with my head in the clouds 24/7. It’s true, don’t expect any deep, meaningful conversation out of me because I intend on wearing blue dresses and …

by Shannon Bucaro
Now that I just woke up from my February induced sugar coma is it summer yet? I know, who asks that question in March?  But I fear if I see another 15 inches of snow my head might spin and green junk may come flying out of my mouth Exorcist style. Sexy isn’t it? So yes, March, my car is up to the doors with snow and my heating bill is still wickedly way too high. For the sake of me not scaring any more children as I’m …

Interview conducted by Marc Patterson, Photo’s courtesy of Ian Merritt of IDM Photography
Shannon is one tough cookie from Wicker Park Chicago.  She’s the newest member of the BrutalAsHell.com crew, and writer of our original column Slash & Dine, having had the oven mitts handed over to her from our former columnist, Natalie Slater.  Since January she has wasted no time diving into the column, already putting her own fresh spin on the column and of course attracting a fantastic new base of readers.  By day she works as a hair stylist …

Happy Birthday to Me. You’re all invited to my party!
Better watch out or Ginny, wait I mean Ann? Yes definitely Ann this time, will slit your… cupcake?
I can’t, I won’t, and yes I out right refuse to do a Valentine’s Day post just because it’s February and apparently the cool thing to do. I would rather be shackled to a pine tree and forced to watch the Notebook again before I dare write anything supporting mushy love. It’s true. I am a bitter shell of a person and …

“I think I’m going mad, as if my brains being eaten by a cat, or better yet baked spaghetti”
by Shannon Bucaro
Wait you again? Did I miss something? Now I know New Year’s is pegged as the go to night for drunken debauchery, however, don’t worry it’s still January. You didn’t somehow rage so hard you managed to black out until February? We’ll just consider you all lucky, and call this a bonus round. You’re welcome.
So now let us reflect on the past couple of weeks. Chances are by now …

This New Year’s you’re invited to a killer bowl of garlic dip and a bloody batch of beer bread
by Shannon Bucaro
A wise lady once said to me, “Why is it you can’t be a chick and a horror fan unless you’re willing to get naked and show your butt?”
Umm…well considering its barely January and butt showing doesn’t begin until June I figured I should probably just start with my name. Helllllooo fellow horror fanatics, I am Shannon, your new kitchen crusading, zombie loving gore gal. Now I’m sure you’re all …

by Natalie Slater of Bake & Destroy
Happy November, everyone! Might I start out this holiday post by stating that I despise Thanksgiving? That’s right, me – the girl who keeps a notebook next to her bed incase she dreams about any good new recipes. I hate the most gluttonous day of the year.
Part of my distaste comes from being vegetarian for the past ten years. (Coincidentally, if you like gore, you’ll love the turkey slaughterhouse videos features on most vegetarian activist groups’ websites this time of year.) But more than …