FRIGHTFEST UK ’09: Film Review: I Sell the Dead
I Sell The Dead (2009)
Release Date: August 7, 2009
Directed by: Glenn McQuaid
Cast: Dominic Monaghan, Ron Perlman, Larry Fessenden, Angus Scrimm
I Sell The Dead is the first full-length film from Glenn McQuaid, starring Dominic Monaghan (Lord of the Rings, Lost) as a grave robber who encounters the undead, Larry Fessenden (The Resurrection Apprentice, Cabin Fever 2) as his mentor, Ron Perlman (Hellboy, Chronos) as a priest with an unhealthy interest in the occult, and Angus Scrimm (Phantasm) as a mad doctor who needs bodies to conduct his research. It’s an adaptation of his 2005 short, The Resurrection Apprentice.
After being caught by a trail of gruesome body parts leading to his door, Arthur Blake (Monaghan) finds himself being questioned by priest Father Duffy (Ron Perlman) about his life as a grave robber, and the whole film is told as a series of flashback stories held together by the narrative between the two.
With a similar trail of body parts leading to his partner’s demise just a few days earlier, Arthur tries to convince the priest of his innocence – at least of the murders, not the grave robbing. Father Duffy, however, is only interested in recording his story, and Arthur tells the tale of his life from a small boy who fell into the body snatching line of work with Willie Grimes (Larry Fessenden), through to his more recent exploits in the lucrative business of capturing the undead.
The stories themselves are varied and many, including mad doctors, invading wakes, finding the undead, unusual burials, and gang rivalry, and are all loosely tied together in an over-arching plot leading up to the events Arthur finds himself in now. While individually every story is self-contained enough and contains subtle clues as to what has happened, they fail to gel into a movie that lasts the 85 minute run time, and the film betrays its 13 minute origins in The Resurrection Apprentice.
I Sell The Dead is beautifully shot, if a little schizophrenic: bouncing between fog filled graveyards and moors reminiscent of the Hammer House of Horror films, and comic book style freeze frames and credits. The locations are spot on, and ,even if not historically accurate, do a great job of capturing the feeling of late 18th – early 19th century life.
That’s not the only homage though, with McQuaid attempting at shooting a Raimi-style undead character during the first encounter with a vampire. The problem with trying to do Raimi when you’re not Raimi, is that it looks awful, and this was no exception. The film in general has no problems with getting across its intended look and feel.
The stories as well were mostly interesting, with even the duller ones having a twist or developing the overall plot slightly. The problem McQuaid has with breaking the story down in to bite sized chunks is that the important (and the most interesting) characters are introduced much too late and not fully developed, while incidental characters – like the barman – gain far too much screen time, with Grimes and Blake spending a disproportionate amount of time in there.
Although humorous, I Sell The Dead never quite builds the laughs to anything remotely approaching a ‘lol’. The comedic acting and timing is done well by all of the cast, as are the serious parts, but I struggle to remember anything coming close to a real joke. The horror elements also aren’t scary, and as I recall there’s not too much swearing, any sort of nudity, or anything less than comic about the violence, so I am not really sure why it has a (UK) 15 certificate.
For all the things it does well there is just something a little boring about the film as a whole, and despite an obvious talent for writing and directing, McQuaid never really brings the film up to the level where it’s something special. Ultimately, there are worse films to watch and less entertaining ways to spend an evening, but without a particular reason to recommend I Sell The Dead, I can only suggest watching this when it comes to TV.
ZC Barry writes for Zombie Command; a UK based zombie website featuring zombie news, reviews and interviews.
Brutal as Hell rating 2.5/5
